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Lauren Bobert has no more conception of how to comport herself publicwise than a cat has how to solve a differential equation.

Let us be charitable a little. Most of us as, we stumbled gracelessly from adolescence to adulthood stepped over a line and behaved abominably in public a time or two, but with the compensating blessing that in the morning we would be sober. In her case, on the morning after -- and every morning for ever and ever after that -- Lauren Bobert will remain still Lauren Bobert.

Having watched the videos of her behavior during the performance, and her apparent difficulty getting her dress to constrain prominent features of her anatomy within its limits, it occurs to me an appropriate pronunciation of her last name would rhyme with "Schubert".

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