My Brother's, 4, of the all Republicanish... mixed with douche bags, I mean tea bags, and yeah the youngest and orevioysly my closest sibling of 6. Was so paranoid that I was indoctrination his adult daughters behind his back, that I have been cut off for 2 years. The 2 males in the middle. Live far enough away that I just talk to their wives. On Thanksgiving eve, my oldest brother who I had an agreement to not talk about politics. He called me basically to gloat. I reminded him we have an agreement and the more I refused to argue. The more intense he got. I finally said firmly, David. We have agreement to no discuss politics. Now, is there any other topic you would like to talk about? Uh, no I just can't wait for you to admit you are, click. One more sibling down.
2 sisters, one is so MAGA and she and her husband are both Vets. 🙄 the last sister lives with a creepy unibomber type and only calls me when she needs something.
🤔 I guess it could be me?! And I even made a list of Republican fam and friends to hide my pre election posts to be the Adult in the Room! They all have or had jobs driving, I blame Sirious XM and Joe Rogan for making them so radicalized, angry and haters. We grew up in Maine. They never saw a black person growing up. But when Obama ran I learned they were al racists. Really sad. We were all close. Now I'm alone. Me and my Asian love. And yes that's not OK with them.
I was too sick to go to Thanksgiving, thank God! Here’s hoping I catch another cold for Christmas. I can see my grandchildren any time, so I don’t need to endure spending time with the Magats in my husband’s family.
Been trying to figure out the right balance post election and you have wise words. Clearly you've been through this before. Reframing and looking for the good (if you haven't lost all respect for others) in others is a good thing to try.
And thank you for taking the burden on of Trump news. I didn't want it that's for sure.
I work in an American company here in Australia and it's sure weird now. You can't say or ask anything re politics at work. And even in personal life when u find out someone proudly likes Trump, it resets the relationship. Your election has reverberated around the world.
Interesting times we live in.
Ps Australia labour fed gov just passed laws to ban social media under 16!
Amazing how much better the economy is getting now that Trump has been elected. Record box office for movies, record air travel, online shopping strong and crowds out for Black Friday.
Once again we see the dichotomy between voter beliefs and reality, which I believe is due to Fox News and the internet. I listened to JVL and Sarah discuss how politics is becoming increasingly performative. At the same time our news has also become the same, as have the presidential debates. It is rare to learn much at all in a presidential debate, and maybe more rare to find any actual news on a news program.
Fox will spin anything Trump does in a positive light, and our network news will present a little bit of both sides, and our great national divide will continue. Propaganda does work, better than fair and balanced.
I have struggled with how to deal with all the feelings when it comes to the very few people in my world who voted for that terrible man. Your words helped me immensely & I can’t thank you enough for your advice on this matter and for all you do almost every day to help me through this challenging time. You are a wonderful man.
On my own here, so no advice about the first question. For the second question, I joined the eXodus to Blue Sky, where there are no toxic trolls, no Trump 24/7, and no Elon barging his way into every feed. You can choose who you want to follow, just like the old Twitter, and there’s nothing more soothing than scrolling through pictures of cute pets, starry skies, and beautiful landscapes.
Great advice Tim. The problem is that we can control our own behaviour but more than likely, at least some others will do their own (terrible) thing.
If I were hosting, under the “my house, my rules” umbrella I’d insist on no politics of any kind. It’s not just trump. Discussions around Israel and Palestine, support for Ukraine, woke, the impact of AI, assisted dying etc etc can all set off a firestorm.
This may sound lame but I’ve always relied on the anticipation of the after dinner games to buoy the mood! While they can certainly start fights (as everyone regresses to the role in the family of their younger selves) they likely won’t cause permanent damage😉
Happy Thanksgiving to all of my American friends. We Canadians went through this in October and are now gearing up for Christmas.
So agree about the games. Today I had the games out and ready to go and just could not get anyone to take me up on playing them. Then, of course, my Dad brought up Trump and everything devolved.
I guess I’m now going to add a second rule that games are required to help everyone follow the first rule of no politics. Sigh.
Thank you! Your comments are both helpful and brilliant! This is my very first response…I will be recommending your podcast to friends, who like me, need an Oasis in an ever-expanding desert of meaningless news. I have listened to no news, including MSNBC, since the evening of November 5. I even switched NPR to country music in my car. At home TV is for movies, mystery series, entertainment. I listen to a Beethoven Radio Station during the day on Pandora. I consider myself a recovering news junkie since November 2015. My SoulMate of 47 years passed November 11, (11/11 if that has meaning for you). I seem to have moved to a different realm of existence (I’ll be spending days with Jessie my new rescue 4 yo English Springer Spaniel self-appointed companion/therapy dog; walking to stave off my Osteoporosis; and luxuriating in painting with soft pastels.) So I will listen to podcasts whose title suggests a topic that keeps me in the shallow end of the pool. I will try other Bulwark recommendations. I always appreciated Charlie Sykes on Nicole’s discussion groups. Anyway, thank you for giving me a safe landing space going forward. I’m 77 yo white professional woman, who fought hard for Peace, Civil Rights and Women’s Rights. I danced in the streets when we elected Barack Obama. Naively, I guess, I never even imagined a backlash. But, here we are. And, we are the leaders we’ve been waiting for. Just don’t know how much of “If it’s to be, it’s up to me,” I have left. Right now focused on healing and seeking God’s Peace which passes all understanding.
❤️🙏❤️ Thank you for what you do…you feel like a lifeline with a buoy flung to me in a raging sea. We still have a North Star…we just have to keep moving towards it. ❤️🙏❤️👍👍
Well…I tried. It didn’t go great, but it also wasn’t a knock down drag out. It was just my husband, me, and my Trumpist parents. They left early.
Dad brought up Donald Trump, and I said I didn’t invite Donald to Thanksgiving. Was hoping that would be the end of it, but they asked questions, so I answered them. Problem is I got a little emotional and didn’t answer them all well, but I calmed myself down enough to say these just aren’t the values y’all taught me. We awkwardly tried to shift subject after and it just didn’t work, so they decided to leave. I hate this, and I hate this awful man for not loving his country enough to stay at Mar-a-lago and play golf. I am really sad.
I have pulled back a bit. Read Kyiv Independent appreciate their journalistic style which is a throwback to a time gone. Also, have taken the time to leave the computer at home so I can go to quiet places along the waterfront where I am joyfully reading historical biographies of past Presidents and novels based in a time with some historical content such as Mitch Albom's "The Little Liar.". Reading several books at once each put aside for specific times of my day. Currently reading a novel covering the end of FDR's term and the rise of Truman. The parallel of our times with those times I find a welcome diversion but also informative. It satisfies what I'm hunting for when I obsessively spend hours on current pod casts and news media. So much better. Try it.
Reading three currently. One on the coffee table and one next to my bed and one in the car. Here are the titles with short synopses taken from jacket covers: #1) Ascent To Power by David L. Ross (How Truman emerged from Roosevelt's Shadow and Remade the World) recommend it highly it is delicious, and #2) The Little Liar by Mitch Albom (An Unforgettable Story of Truth and Lies set during the Holocaust) feel like I'm right there with the characters while the horror of what is to come slowly engulfs each of them in tragedy and unbearable loss, and #3) The Dying Animal by Phillip Roth love this author and it is set in a time period when I came of age but in retrospect glad to have side stepped most of the sexual revolution which was in my view was destructive (Set in the sexual revolution of the 1960's... the author once again entangles the fate of his characters with the social forces that shape our daily lives).
Yes. Love the sinner, hate the sin. We are all a work in progress. I heard someone else suggest thinking of Republican or MAGA loved ones as addicts or cult members. They have to choose recovery. You should not allow them to abuse you in any way; you need to be who you are. But recovery is within a loving community and you can only be that if you stay connected and loving.
Thanks Tim. Very wise advice about the family at Thanksgiving. The aside about alcohol was also spot on. You should repost this every year at this time. Happy Thanksgiving.
My Brother's, 4, of the all Republicanish... mixed with douche bags, I mean tea bags, and yeah the youngest and orevioysly my closest sibling of 6. Was so paranoid that I was indoctrination his adult daughters behind his back, that I have been cut off for 2 years. The 2 males in the middle. Live far enough away that I just talk to their wives. On Thanksgiving eve, my oldest brother who I had an agreement to not talk about politics. He called me basically to gloat. I reminded him we have an agreement and the more I refused to argue. The more intense he got. I finally said firmly, David. We have agreement to no discuss politics. Now, is there any other topic you would like to talk about? Uh, no I just can't wait for you to admit you are, click. One more sibling down.
2 sisters, one is so MAGA and she and her husband are both Vets. 🙄 the last sister lives with a creepy unibomber type and only calls me when she needs something.
🤔 I guess it could be me?! And I even made a list of Republican fam and friends to hide my pre election posts to be the Adult in the Room! They all have or had jobs driving, I blame Sirious XM and Joe Rogan for making them so radicalized, angry and haters. We grew up in Maine. They never saw a black person growing up. But when Obama ran I learned they were al racists. Really sad. We were all close. Now I'm alone. Me and my Asian love. And yes that's not OK with them.
I was too sick to go to Thanksgiving, thank God! Here’s hoping I catch another cold for Christmas. I can see my grandchildren any time, so I don’t need to endure spending time with the Magats in my husband’s family.
Thank you Tim all the way from Australia!
Best therapy session for the month!
Been trying to figure out the right balance post election and you have wise words. Clearly you've been through this before. Reframing and looking for the good (if you haven't lost all respect for others) in others is a good thing to try.
And thank you for taking the burden on of Trump news. I didn't want it that's for sure.
I work in an American company here in Australia and it's sure weird now. You can't say or ask anything re politics at work. And even in personal life when u find out someone proudly likes Trump, it resets the relationship. Your election has reverberated around the world.
Interesting times we live in.
Ps Australia labour fed gov just passed laws to ban social media under 16!
Amazing how much better the economy is getting now that Trump has been elected. Record box office for movies, record air travel, online shopping strong and crowds out for Black Friday.
Once again we see the dichotomy between voter beliefs and reality, which I believe is due to Fox News and the internet. I listened to JVL and Sarah discuss how politics is becoming increasingly performative. At the same time our news has also become the same, as have the presidential debates. It is rare to learn much at all in a presidential debate, and maybe more rare to find any actual news on a news program.
Fox will spin anything Trump does in a positive light, and our network news will present a little bit of both sides, and our great national divide will continue. Propaganda does work, better than fair and balanced.
Love the intention to report on what’s happening instead of getting caught up in fear about what might happen, which is just playing into Maga’s bait.
I have struggled with how to deal with all the feelings when it comes to the very few people in my world who voted for that terrible man. Your words helped me immensely & I can’t thank you enough for your advice on this matter and for all you do almost every day to help me through this challenging time. You are a wonderful man.
On my own here, so no advice about the first question. For the second question, I joined the eXodus to Blue Sky, where there are no toxic trolls, no Trump 24/7, and no Elon barging his way into every feed. You can choose who you want to follow, just like the old Twitter, and there’s nothing more soothing than scrolling through pictures of cute pets, starry skies, and beautiful landscapes.
Great advice Tim. The problem is that we can control our own behaviour but more than likely, at least some others will do their own (terrible) thing.
If I were hosting, under the “my house, my rules” umbrella I’d insist on no politics of any kind. It’s not just trump. Discussions around Israel and Palestine, support for Ukraine, woke, the impact of AI, assisted dying etc etc can all set off a firestorm.
This may sound lame but I’ve always relied on the anticipation of the after dinner games to buoy the mood! While they can certainly start fights (as everyone regresses to the role in the family of their younger selves) they likely won’t cause permanent damage😉
Happy Thanksgiving to all of my American friends. We Canadians went through this in October and are now gearing up for Christmas.
So agree about the games. Today I had the games out and ready to go and just could not get anyone to take me up on playing them. Then, of course, my Dad brought up Trump and everything devolved.
I guess I’m now going to add a second rule that games are required to help everyone follow the first rule of no politics. Sigh.
Thank you! Your comments are both helpful and brilliant! This is my very first response…I will be recommending your podcast to friends, who like me, need an Oasis in an ever-expanding desert of meaningless news. I have listened to no news, including MSNBC, since the evening of November 5. I even switched NPR to country music in my car. At home TV is for movies, mystery series, entertainment. I listen to a Beethoven Radio Station during the day on Pandora. I consider myself a recovering news junkie since November 2015. My SoulMate of 47 years passed November 11, (11/11 if that has meaning for you). I seem to have moved to a different realm of existence (I’ll be spending days with Jessie my new rescue 4 yo English Springer Spaniel self-appointed companion/therapy dog; walking to stave off my Osteoporosis; and luxuriating in painting with soft pastels.) So I will listen to podcasts whose title suggests a topic that keeps me in the shallow end of the pool. I will try other Bulwark recommendations. I always appreciated Charlie Sykes on Nicole’s discussion groups. Anyway, thank you for giving me a safe landing space going forward. I’m 77 yo white professional woman, who fought hard for Peace, Civil Rights and Women’s Rights. I danced in the streets when we elected Barack Obama. Naively, I guess, I never even imagined a backlash. But, here we are. And, we are the leaders we’ve been waiting for. Just don’t know how much of “If it’s to be, it’s up to me,” I have left. Right now focused on healing and seeking God’s Peace which passes all understanding.
❤️🙏❤️ Thank you for what you do…you feel like a lifeline with a buoy flung to me in a raging sea. We still have a North Star…we just have to keep moving towards it. ❤️🙏❤️👍👍
Thank you! Listening to the Bulwark folks has made this whole ordeal bearable
Well…I tried. It didn’t go great, but it also wasn’t a knock down drag out. It was just my husband, me, and my Trumpist parents. They left early.
Dad brought up Donald Trump, and I said I didn’t invite Donald to Thanksgiving. Was hoping that would be the end of it, but they asked questions, so I answered them. Problem is I got a little emotional and didn’t answer them all well, but I calmed myself down enough to say these just aren’t the values y’all taught me. We awkwardly tried to shift subject after and it just didn’t work, so they decided to leave. I hate this, and I hate this awful man for not loving his country enough to stay at Mar-a-lago and play golf. I am really sad.
Though we don't know each other I do know just how you feel. You aren't alone.
I'm sorry. I really can't imagine this. My son-in-law may have voted for T. I really don't want to know.
I have pulled back a bit. Read Kyiv Independent appreciate their journalistic style which is a throwback to a time gone. Also, have taken the time to leave the computer at home so I can go to quiet places along the waterfront where I am joyfully reading historical biographies of past Presidents and novels based in a time with some historical content such as Mitch Albom's "The Little Liar.". Reading several books at once each put aside for specific times of my day. Currently reading a novel covering the end of FDR's term and the rise of Truman. The parallel of our times with those times I find a welcome diversion but also informative. It satisfies what I'm hunting for when I obsessively spend hours on current pod casts and news media. So much better. Try it.
Sounds like a good idea! What titles are you reading?
Reading three currently. One on the coffee table and one next to my bed and one in the car. Here are the titles with short synopses taken from jacket covers: #1) Ascent To Power by David L. Ross (How Truman emerged from Roosevelt's Shadow and Remade the World) recommend it highly it is delicious, and #2) The Little Liar by Mitch Albom (An Unforgettable Story of Truth and Lies set during the Holocaust) feel like I'm right there with the characters while the horror of what is to come slowly engulfs each of them in tragedy and unbearable loss, and #3) The Dying Animal by Phillip Roth love this author and it is set in a time period when I came of age but in retrospect glad to have side stepped most of the sexual revolution which was in my view was destructive (Set in the sexual revolution of the 1960's... the author once again entangles the fate of his characters with the social forces that shape our daily lives).
Thanks! I will have to check those out.
Thanks Tim. Great podcast. Just the advice I needed. And, I will take you up on that and let you and your colleagues filter some this for me.
Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family.
I am grateful for Tim Miller.
Yes. Love the sinner, hate the sin. We are all a work in progress. I heard someone else suggest thinking of Republican or MAGA loved ones as addicts or cult members. They have to choose recovery. You should not allow them to abuse you in any way; you need to be who you are. But recovery is within a loving community and you can only be that if you stay connected and loving.
Thanks Tim. Very wise advice about the family at Thanksgiving. The aside about alcohol was also spot on. You should repost this every year at this time. Happy Thanksgiving.